How to gracefully and painlessly remove yourself from sticky social situations？How to escape a dull conversation at a party?

    如何輕松得體地從那些“粘人”的社交場(chǎng)合中脫身？如何逃離聚會(huì)中的無(wú)聊談話(huà)?如何結(jié)束一場(chǎng)爭(zhēng)執(zhí)？對(duì)于這些常見(jiàn)的尷尬處境，本文將教你幾招，讓你和尷尬說(shuō)拜拜。

    Escape a dull coversation 結(jié)束無(wú)聊的談話(huà)

    At a cocktail party (assuming you haven’t made the mistake of sitting down with the person), it’s fine to excuse yourself to get a drink or food, help the hostess, or make a phone call. (If you did sit down, employ the same tactics. It’s just a little more awkward having to get up.) To avoid an embarrassing getaway “gotcha,” be sure to follow through on your excuse — that is, get the drink, help the hostess, make a call.

    在雞尾酒會(huì)上（假設(shè)你還沒(méi)傻傻地和一個(gè)無(wú)聊的人一塊坐下），如果想抽身，就托辭去拿飲料或食物、幫助女主人或打電話(huà)（如果你坐下了，也可以采取同樣辦法，不過(guò)會(huì)稍微尷尬一些）。為了不讓你在”勝利大逃亡“中被尷尬地逮住，就一定要”說(shuō)到做到“，即：去拿飲料、幫女主人、打電話(huà)。

    Another tried-and-true tactic? Introduce the bore to someone else, excuse yourself, and scram. This way, you avoid leaving the bore stranded, and he becomes someone else’s problem. Who knows? They may hit it off.

    有別的切實(shí)可行的招數(shù)嗎？你可以把這無(wú)聊的人介紹給別人，然后找個(gè)借口趕緊撤！這樣就避免了被無(wú)聊的人纏身，他成了別人的麻煩。可誰(shuí)知道呢？說(shuō)不定那兩人會(huì)很投機(jī)。

    Escape a telemarketer 逃離電話(huà)營(yíng)銷(xiāo)員

    A polite “Thanks, I’m not interested” is your best response to unwanted calls. “The caller will probably come back with a benefit statement or a probing question” — such as Are you aware this will cut your insurance bill in half? — says Kimberly King, president of InterWeave Corporation, a customer-service consulting firm in Tampa. Again, thank the person and hang up. Don’t let her rattle on, which is a waste of your time and hers. And never explain or volunteer anything. Telemarketers work from a script with responses to common customer objections (called “soft no’s” in the industry). Saying another family member needs to make the decision will only lead to more questions: What time will he be in? Can I call back then? Finally, ask to be taken off the calling list, and wait for the telemarketer to do it before you hang up. That extra minute is worth it.

    一句客氣的“謝謝，我不感興趣”是給煩人電話(huà)的最好答復(fù)。打電話(huà)的人大概又會(huì)說(shuō)他/她將給你帶來(lái)什么樣的好處，或者問(wèn)你這樣的問(wèn)題，比如Kimberly King會(huì)問(wèn)：“你知道嗎，這能讓你的保險(xiǎn)帳單費(fèi)減半。” Kimberly KingInter是Weave Corporation的總裁，這是一家位于坦帕市的客服咨詢(xún)公司。你繼續(xù)說(shuō)謝謝，然后就掛斷電話(huà)。別由她嘰里呱啦說(shuō)個(gè)不停，浪費(fèi)你倆的時(shí)間。不要做任何解釋或自愿做任何事情。電話(huà)營(yíng)銷(xiāo)員都采用一個(gè)腳本來(lái)對(duì)付客戶(hù)通常做出的拒絕（行話(huà)叫“軟拒絕”）。如果你回答道：這要由家人做決定。那他/她就會(huì)窮追不舍，提出更多問(wèn)題：他什么時(shí)候會(huì)在家里? 到時(shí)候我再打電話(huà)好嗎？最后，只好要求他/她把你的號(hào)碼從呼叫單上撤除，并且要求對(duì)方撤除后你再掛電話(huà)。多花點(diǎn)時(shí)間是值得的。

    Escape a Stumper 如何對(duì)付“提難題的人”

    How do you say “I don’t know” without sounding, well, dumb? Especially in a nerve-racking setting, like a job interview? Be direct, says Sue Shellenbarger, a career-advice columnist at the Wall Street Journal: Just say, “That’s a great question. I’d like to think about it and get back to you.”

    要怎樣說(shuō)“我不知道”才能讓自己聽(tīng)上去不傻？尤其在一個(gè)讓人緊張的場(chǎng)合，比如工作面試？華爾街的職業(yè)建議專(zhuān)欄作家Sue Shellenbarger的建議是：坦白。只要說(shuō)：“這個(gè)問(wèn)題很好，我要先考慮一下再回答。”

    If you don’t have a good answer because you haven’t been doing your job well, apologize and specify when you’ll get back on the query; then be sure to do so or you’ll lose credibility. If putting off the question isn’t an option (you’re a keynote speaker at an event; you’re being interviewed on TV), employ the Ted Kennedy strategy, says Anne Fisher, who writes Ask Annie, a career-advice column for CNNMoney. com: “Say, ‘That’s a good question, but an even more interesting question is.…’” Then talk about what you do know. “It’s worked for Kennedy,” says Fisher. “He’s been elected eight times.”

    如果是因?yàn)樽约旱墓ぷ饕恢睕](méi)做好而找不到一個(gè)好的答案，那么就道歉，然后確定何時(shí)反饋該問(wèn)題的結(jié)果；然后，一定要說(shuō)話(huà)算話(huà)，否則你將會(huì)失去信用了。如果不可能推遲回答問(wèn)題（例如你在演講或在電視上被采訪），Anne Fisher說(shuō)可以采取Ted Kennedy（肯尼迪總統(tǒng)的弟弟）的策略。Anne Fisher是CNNMoney網(wǎng)站職業(yè)建議專(zhuān)欄《問(wèn)安妮》專(zhuān)欄作家。你可以說(shuō)“這個(gè)問(wèn)題問(wèn)得很好，但更有趣的是......” 然后就說(shuō)你知道的。” Fisher說(shuō)：“這個(gè)辦法幫過(guò)Kennedy的忙。他贏得八次議員選舉。”

    Escape a spat with your significant other 如何結(jié)束爭(zhēng)執(zhí)

    He started it. Well, maybe you did. Either way, you don’t want to talk about it anymore. Do you have to finish what you began? No, says David Ransburg, a therapist at the Family Institute at Northwestern University, in Evanston, Illinois. In fact, you shouldn’t continue until you’re calm. “When we’re in a ‘flooded’ emotional state, access to the part of the brain where logical thinking resides is inhibited, and IQ drops noticeably — perhaps by as much as 15 points,” says Ransburg. “This is when we say things we wish we could take back.” So call a time-out. Typically, your logic will return in about 20 minutes, at which point you can resume the discussion in a productive way.

    剛才是他引發(fā)的爭(zhēng)吵，嗯，說(shuō)不定是你。但不管是誰(shuí)，反正你不想再吵下去了。一定要吵出個(gè)究竟才會(huì)罷休嗎？David Ransburg說(shuō)：不。David Ransburg是伊利諾斯州Evanston市西北大學(xué)家庭學(xué)院的一名治療學(xué)家。他說(shuō)，實(shí)際上，在你心情平靜前，不應(yīng)該繼續(xù)說(shuō)下去。 Ransburg說(shuō)：“爭(zhēng)吵時(shí)，我們都處于一個(gè)“頭腦發(fā)脹“的狀態(tài)，不理智，智商顯著下降了大概15個(gè)點(diǎn)，這時(shí)候說(shuō)過(guò)的話(huà)會(huì)讓我們后悔”。所以，先暫停。通常，你的邏輯能力會(huì)在大約20分鐘后恢復(fù)，然后以具有成果性的方式進(jìn)行討論。

    If you can’t call a time-out midspat, practice with tiny disagreements, suggests Ransburg, when you’re both less likely to take things personally。

    如果你不能”中場(chǎng)暫停“，Ransburg的建議是，人們用細(xì)小的爭(zhēng)論來(lái)練習(xí)，因?yàn)榇藭r(shí)你們兩人較不容易感情用事。